Just Happy? Or Happier?
by kamikazecat
Summary: shoujoai haters, DON'T READ Can Usagi live with just being happy? Especially when what she knows will make her happier is just a few feet away...


AN: Hey. This is my first fic on this kind of subject, so don't get to disappointed after you read it. Oh, and if you want to review, I do appreciate the input, but I don't need it. I'm fully aware of my bad writing skills, so I don't need the encouragement. I just write because I like to.

I do hope you enjoy the story! Oh, and, again, shoujo-ai haters, don't read.

Just Happy? Or Happier?

Wisps of fog danced in the dim light of the streetlamp. Their translucent white tails chasing each other and twirling together in the still night air. The fog seemed to encase the quiet, peaceful shrine in a layer of timelessness. This smothering mist, which slowly pulled any warmth away and into itself, wouldn't lift until morning. And that was exactly how she wanted it.

Shuddering from the all too welcome cold, the woman stared through the darkness. Her presence unnoticed in the night, she was free to observe without interruption.

Just visible through the open window was her oblivious subject. Raven hair spread like a veil across white bed sheets. Violet eyes closed against consciousness, soft and steady breaths puffing out from between two perfect lips. A delicate hand curled loosely around the corner of a pillow, slender fingers occasionally twitching in response to random dreams that spun though her resting mind. Hino Rei slept on into the night, blissfully unaware of what went on around her.

The woman outside of the miko's window allowed the beginnings of a smile to tug at the corners of her mouth as she thought of this sleeping vision in front of her. Rei, in her wakeful hours, was the epitome of passion. The embodiment of fiery devotion. Despite being adamant in self-control, Rei was always one to be honest with herself. She never failed to let her heart lead her, be it through sun-kissed fields of daisies or the battle fires of hell.

Being who she was, Rei was never very good at keeping secrets. So why she felt as if she could hide this horrendously strong wish of hers from her closest friend was a mystery. It was easy enough to see on her beautifully exotic face. The lingering looks of desire. Those eyes so full of love and longing whenever she cast the stray glances she thought went unnoticed. The expression of utter heartbreak whenever she realized her dream would never become a reality. It was easy enough to figure out.

Hino Rei was completely, head-over-heels, until-the-end-of-time-and-beyond in love. And Hino Rei was absolutely positive she would never be loved in return.

A quiet sigh escaped the watching figure. Her fingers tightened into a fist as she stared without blinking at the dormant soldier of fire.

Oh, if only she were free! Free from the repressing weight of destiny. Free from the obligations of her unwanted station in life. Free to feel for herself, and not just for others.

She knew her friends wanted her to be happy. That's all they ever wanted for her. And she was happy. Truly, she was. She had her prince, her future, her family secured in what seemed to be stone. And she was happy.

But Usagi wanted to be happier.

What she had was the dream of a little girl. The wish of a child who wanted a storybook ending. A future which would be stable and make her pleasantly content.

But she didn't want to be just content. She wanted life and love and passion and pain and hardships and success! She didn't just want pleasantness. Peace went unappreciated without war. Love went unnoticed without hate. And she didn't want to have the good unless she also had the bad to make her realize how amazingly lucky she was.

Usagi watched as Rei stirred and rolled to her side, bringing more of her peaceful face into view.

Every night she came here to watch the miko. Every night since she finally found what she really wanted. Someone she loved with all of her being who loved her just as much in return. And she found that in Rei. She found it in her best friend and most adamant guardian. The senshi of fire who wielded a strong power and an even stronger will. Every night she came here to stand in the dark, in the cold, and gaze upon this beautiful creature who, she knew, would give her the stars if she only asked. This beautiful creature she herself would do anything for.

Sighing again, Usagi leaned back against the rough bark of a cherry tree. Why couldn't she just accept her fate? Why couldn't she be happiest with what she had? Why did she have to know that her heart was right, that she could have so much more? Why did it have to hurt her so much whenever she saw the look of love and hopelessness on Rei's face? Why couldn't she do anything to ease the pain the miko constantly felt? Why couldn't she fight against a fate she never chose and didn't want?

Usagi paused for a moment. A small gasp escaped her lips as a sudden and surprisingly obvious thought struck her.

It was true she was Serenity, a former princess bound by fate. It was also true she was Sailor Moon, the guardian of mankind and protector of peace. And, yes, she was someday going to become Neo-Queen Serenity, the monarch of this universe. But, most importantly, and most presently, she was Tsukino Usagi. She was just a girl. And she was a girl who wanted love.

Yes, Rei was far from the perfect person. She was hot tempered and rash. She had inspired many tears in the blond, only to desperately try to rectify what she had done afterwards. Rei protected her and loved her without question. She wanted Usagi to be as happy as she could be, even if it meant that Rei herself was miserable. And that was something that no one had ever done for Usagi. Not even the kind yet distant Mamoru.

In the end, it all came down to one simple thing:

Usagi wanted Rei. And Rei wanted Usagi.

Who were they to deny each other a chance at true happiness?

Grinning as wide as her small mouth would let her, Usagi made her decision. Destiny could do without her this time. And, as for Mamoru… He was a great guy. He would find someone new.

Slowly lifting herself through the small opening that was Rei's window, she silently set her booted feet on the dark wood floor. She made her way across the room, still grinning, her heart pounding in an incredible rhythm. Sliding into the empty edge of the bed next to Rei, she gently wrapped her arms around her angel, making sure not to wake the miko. Leaning forward, Usagi softly kissed sleeping lips before she pulled back to take in the vision before her that she hoped would soon be hers and hers alone.

A slight groan sounded from the raven haired beauty's throat as her striking eyes fluttered open, taking in the sight before her in a kind of dazed and exhausted shock. Her mouth fell open slightly and her eyes widened as she released a disoriented grunt as she noticed her surroundings fully. After a frozen moment in time, Rei finally was able to force out one word. A name that she loved saying, that felt so good as it rolled off her tongue. A name she treasured more than any other. The name of a person who was confusing her to no end at the moment. "U-usagi?"

Letting out a giggle, Usagi leaned forward again, giving Rei's lips a quick peck before resting their foreheads together. She stared into violet eyes that were still a bit sleepy, quite a bit confused, and which were slowly filling with a bruised and battered hope.

Smiling gently, Usagi tightened her arms around the prone body of the miko.

"Hey Rei?" Her voice was gentle and loving and truly happy, the happiest Rei had ever heard it. "How does dinner sound? Tomorrow night. Just the two of us."

Yeah. Destiny could just do without them this time.


End file.
